“You gotta keep making decisions”
I recently came across an incredible movie/documentary called Touching the Void, about two elite mountaineers from the 80s who took on a mountain that no one had ever climbed before. I highly recommend it (it is even on YouTube, and it is also a book). In one of the scenes, the climber describes a realization he had:
“You gotta make decisions. You gotta keep making decisions, even if they're wrong decisions…”
This sounds obvious, yet it is so subtle because I don’t think we realize the number of decisions that we make each day. Many of us are operating on some form of unconscious autopilot whereby habit patterns are making all of our decisions for us. Moreover, those patterns are hardwired together through decades of neuroplasticity that cause it to act in a way that is efficient, therefore self-preserving. Despite evolution requiring adaptation as one of its key attributes, in our relatively safe and predictive world, we don’t really require that level of adaptation. So, what happens? Our brain gets lazy and wants to stay lazy.
Now, let’s take that quote (“you gotta keep making decisions”) and bring it to actual life. Life is complex. Should you move? Change careers? Start a workout program? Change your workout program? What should you have for breakfast? The list goes on and on. Life is seemingly filled with nothing but decisions to be made, and therefore it is so important to note that if we fall back on the default mode of prediction/efficiency, then mostly all of those decisions are actually being made for us, not by us.
Why this is relevant to coaching, and particularly, the way in which I work with people, is that whether we like it or not (or realize it or not), we make decisions ALL THE TIME! If you can truly see this, something may stir in you that says “I need to start watching the decisions I am making.” And if you truly understand the default mode network and how the brain works (or even have a faint sense), then you might realize that having more conscious awareness for the decisions we make is critical. This level of awareness can be significantly enhanced with the help of a good coach.
We want to start analyzing the important decisions that we are making and seeing if those decisions are actually in alignment with what is best for us, those around us, and maybe even the world at large. What part of us is making those decisions? Is that part adequately considering all that is available to it, or is it resting on its single-track way of thinking? Left unchecked, the decisions can be quite self-serving and may not represent our highest potential. Think about the person addicted to their work but have family at home yearning for their presence. Many of these people are not willfully ignoring the love and care of their family…the decisions are being made for them (not by them).
Finally, like the quote mentions, even if they are the wrong decisions, at least you are learning. Don’t we want our children to have the bravery to make decisions and the wisdom to learn from them? Well this is how we too can keep learning, and maybe start listening to a higher form of wisdom coming through.
Whether you decide to work with a coach, or do something else positive for yourself and the world, make a good decision for yourself today.
Joe
